Leaves of Turf is a game-by-game, season-long series of football verse by TWER poet lAUreate Amorak Huey. We’ve been patting ourselves on the back for 13 straight weeks for asking him to do this. Still patting. His first poem can be found here, his second here, his third here, his fourth here, his fifth here, his sixth here, his seventh here, his eight here, his ninth here, his tenth here, his eleventh here, his twelfth here.
After a season of turning to the giants of poetry for inspiration, Tuesday’s ruling on Cam Newton’s eligibility has a giddy Amorak looking for a something he can dance to, so he borrowed from a classic little number by They Might Be Giants.
He Might Be a Giant
Game 13: SEC Championship vs. South Carolina, December 4, 2010
Quarterback Cam, Quarterback Cam
Does things on the field no one else can.
Who can stop him? Nobody knows.
Quarterback Cam!
Is he a runner or is he a thrower?
When he has the ball, do D-coordinators cower?
Can he be tackled, Quarterback Cam?
Or do tacklers get Cammed all o’er?
Mullen man, Meyer man –
They both hate Quarterback Cam.
They have a fight, Quarterback wins:
Eligible Cam.
Eligible Cam, Tiger Cam,
Pride of the program Cam:
Not even sacrilege to compare him to Bo. Man!
Quarterback Cam!
Quarterback Cam, Quarterback Cam –
Quarterback Cam has two more games,
Both will be fights but we believe in Cam:
Champion Cam.
…
Amorak Huey didn’t go to Auburn, but he did have a fake Auburn ID so he could sit in the Jordan-Hare student section throughout his college years. A graduate of Birmingham-Southern College, Amorak spent fifteen years as a newspaper reporter and editor at papers in Florida, Kentucky and Michigan. Two years ago, he left his job as assistant sports editor at The Grand Rapids Press to take a position teaching writing at Grand Valley State University. He holds an MFA in creative writing from Western Michigan University, and his poetry has appeared in a number of literary journals. He lives in East Grand Rapids, Mich., with his wife and two children. You can find him online at www.amorakhuey.net.
nice.
Bravo! As a long-time TMBG fan, I applaud your work here.
Can’t go back to Tuscaloosa,
No, no you can’t go back to Tuscaloosa.
Long time gone was Tuscaloosa,
Why did Tuscaloosa get the works?
That’s nobodies business but the turds!