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Plainslinks doesn’t have time for witty titles

It’s Friday. This is gonna be quick:

Can’t believe I used the Malzahn Blingee gif already this week. Because clearly, that’s the best illustration possible of today’s news that Auburn’s assistants got paid, son:

Offensive coordinator Gus Malzahn is receiving the biggest percentage raise, a 43 percent hike that will bring his salary to $500,000 a year. All the other assistants are receiving 10 percent raises, The Birmingham News learned.

Chizik’s compensation will increase to $2.1 million from $1.9 million annually …

Malzahn made $350,000 last season, trailing only Roof’s $370,000. Roof’s salary moves to $407,000.

Taylor, who is the receivers coach, will make $352,000, defensive line coach Tracy Rocker will make $330,000, offensive line coach Jeff Grimes will make $319,000, recruiting coordinator and running backs coach Curtis Luper will make $286,000, defensive backs coach Tommy Thigpen will make $275,000, defensive backs coach Phillip Lolley will make $231,000 and tight end and special teams coach Jay Boulware will make $231,000.

Anyone want to make the argument these raises weren’t entirely deserved after the season and recruiting cycle we just enjoyed? Didn’t think so. Also important: taking care of the assistants you’ve got should make it easier to hire replacements if and when the time comes.

Swim for victory. The Auburn men hold a narrow lead with the women in third entering the third day of competition at the SEC swim championships. The Tigers won a total of four event-specific SEC titles. Hopefully we’ll see a post here this weekend celebrating the men’s latest SEC title.

Krootin’. Via Track’Em, a composite highlight video for the class of 2010 scored to–yes–Passion Pit:

You get one guess as to whether the YouTube commenters are pleased with the (awesome) music selection. Elsewhere, Beaver has his watch-list for 2011 defensive recruits up. I’m particularly interested in Xzavier Dickson, the first athlete I’ve known who’s actually spelled that name the way they want it pronounced. Good for his parents.

Etc. Three words: Best. Mascot. Ever. … Cam Newton is one of Rivals’ impact JUCOs, but “relatively raw” as a passer isn’t really what we want to hear, unless we’re Neil Caudle (via) … Luke Brietzke starts a countdown of 10 “under-the-radar” Tigers to know with Jessel Curry.

Enjoy your weekend and go U.S.A.

Photo via.

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